Wtf is a meeting? And why do we have to have so many, all day, every day.
Who said that to be productive you had to discuss every little aspect of what you gotta do, and how you are all going to do it?
A recent report, said we spend over 60% of our working day in meetings. That's insane. And just so boring. So, we've come up with some tips. On how to own every meeting.
Sounds interesting we hear you say, but what's in it for me?
We will tell you how to work less, how to look good doing it, and how to cut through the B/S.
So if you're tired of hearing Sharon go on and on about herrrrrr ideas, and being assigned jobs that aren't your job, read on. We've got 5 top tips on how to own every meeting you have.
1. Focus on tasks, deliverables and who is going to do it.
So much of meetings are waffle, "I think this", "You think that". That takes up the vast majority of the time - and to be fair, it often the most pointless part.
Phrases like - "How can we turn this into an action?" "What is the question we are trying to answer here?" force people into thinking about what they need to do, rather than what they think
2. Make sure you are needed in the meeting.
Blanket let's invite the world to every meeting is the norm. Hun, you aren't Beyonce. You don't need an entourage. Don't feel like you're needed in the meeting? Say! Leave! Walk out the door. Let them tell you WHY you are needed.
3. Call people out on the bullshit.
Someone keep using acronyms? Oh you better be that dick that calls them out on it, with some passive aggressive humour.
A recent survey by Institute of Leadership & Management, revealed that management speak is used in almost two thirds (64%) of offices, with nearly a quarter (23%) considering it to be a pointless irritation. "Thinking outside the box" (57%), "going forward" (55%) and "let's touch base" (39%) were identified as the top three most overused pieces of jargon.
Here's how to answer these kind of irritations. "Dave, i'm sure that everyone here thinks you are a P.R.I.C.K for keep using these abbreviations?
"Donna, you keep saying "take a helicopter view" one more time, we're going to have to shove some propellors up your ass.
"Danni, "going forward" we're going to have a problem if you keep on saying things that are incredibly obvious."
4. Make sure your accessories stand out.
If you're going to be forced to sit in a room for an hour and a half, you better have the right kind of accessories to really help derail the meeting, and make you stand out as a bad ass maverick.
We can help.
Koala pen - check.
Cool notebook - maybe this page would be appropriate for a meeting...
Post it note that looks like an avocado.
We got you.
5. Don't be afraid to leave. In the middle. Just up, and go.
It's nearly Black Friday and we've added tonnes of things to our site which meet our strict Comme Glom Criteria:
Only then do we....